I see the bottle feeding mothers watching me as I fumble around under my breastfeeding apron, trying to latch on a wiggly baby that I can't see. Those looks speak a thousand words, most of which boil down to, "don't flash an inch of flesh in public, we're feeding our babies without exposing ourselves, why aren't you?"
I feel as if they're judging me, they can have dad, gran, friends feed their baby, whilst I'm tied to mine almost 24/7. Do they feel superior to me? Certainly I feel that I have to defend my decision to continue through sore nipples and growth spurts, justify why I don't just give a bottle, so they'll accept me.
They sit at the postnatal groups, beady eyes peering at me, bottle lids clicking as my son nurses hungrily. But I can't help noticing how their looks change - A bit of envy maybe - when I start to breastfeed. My guess is they're thinking, "that looks a lot more efficient than bottle feeding". You're right, I want to tell them.
I can almost hear the deafening mental processing in those staid church halls: "She won't have to make up a bottle each feed, sterilise them, tote them around. And imagine just being able to roll over at night and have an instant feed, nobody has to get up to make it, and a built in pacifier."
But I don't want to fall into the trap of judging them too harshly, either. I could easily have ended up bottle feeding, if I didn't get the support that helped me succeed with breastfeeding, most have no idea what they're missing. Now I've cracked breastfeeding, I see the advantages. I'd even choose it again next time. It's really not so bad, I want to tell them, after the early weeks are mastered ..
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The point of this is to demonstrate how ridiculous the original article was. As one reader said on Facebook, it would have been more accurately titled - What I think you're thinking. The reality is that most breast feeders are just trying to get on and feed their baby "discreetly", not judging others, and most bottle feeders are doing the same - it seems everyone feels judged regardless of how they feed their baby. Articles like this, just further hot up the "mummy wars", and we all know how profitable that is.
If I were more of a cynic, I might even wonder if this is a genuine "mummy article" - opinion pieces are free of the "breast is best message" that has to accompany standard articles, and AF companies are not allowed to advertise... The insidious comments re breastfeeding (from someone who didn't do it) and "try it you might like it" theme could be eyebrow raising for some..Just a thought
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The point of this is to demonstrate how ridiculous the original article was. As one reader said on Facebook, it would have been more accurately titled - What I think you're thinking. The reality is that most breast feeders are just trying to get on and feed their baby "discreetly", not judging others, and most bottle feeders are doing the same - it seems everyone feels judged regardless of how they feed their baby. Articles like this, just further hot up the "mummy wars", and we all know how profitable that is.
If I were more of a cynic, I might even wonder if this is a genuine "mummy article" - opinion pieces are free of the "breast is best message" that has to accompany standard articles, and AF companies are not allowed to advertise... The insidious comments re breastfeeding (from someone who didn't do it) and "try it you might like it" theme could be eyebrow raising for some..Just a thought
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